Usually I have marked the passing of a year by Christmas, New Years, or my birthday. In a few years, I will mark the passing of a year by a different event, my father-in-law’s passing. It is very weird to mark a year by death, years are normally marked by happy times, but this 365 day cycle is a little different.

I have learned a lot in the past year. I have found the strength to try and be more caring and gentle to my mother-in-law even though she drives me crazy. I have tried to take my 13 (soon to be 14) year old brother-in-law under my wing. Let me tell you, it is hard to be a strong male role model. I have learned that you only live once and that you should live with as few regrets as possible.

John’s passing, showed me the importance of family, so much so, that Esther and I are planning on starting our own. It has also showed me how important work-home balance is. In a year I have started a left a job, started a new one and worked more than I ever have in my life. As the year is coming to a close, I have been reminded that work is only what we do, who we are is defined by a different set of goals.

In the past year, I have taken up a new hobby, become interested in a hobby to share with my dad, grandfather and extended family, and I am finally learning to let go of things that have cluttered my life. I have seen my sister get married, which I am happy about, and my sister-in-law join the army, which I am very proud of. My sister-in-law also has gotten married, but I’m home John can work some divine intervention in that situation.

It is a weird thing to mark a year by a death, it is inevitable and unfortunate, but as long as I can remember what John would have done, or how he would have reacted, I say that this was a year to learn.